Well, It’s official, Chase and I are moving to Kansas. This is an entirely new change. At the start of the summer I said to myself, “This summer will be great! I’ll draw everyday, learn anatomy, and learn Swedish!” As the summer progressed… I was only learning Swedish… everyday. Months went by and I decided, “Tattoo artist! That’s what I’ll do!” I started drawing Tattoos for a few days. then some time later I couldn’t do it anymore. I stopped drawing, stopped caring and lost the desire. My entire first of Art School I did nothing but draw for classes, even though I had tons of free time, I never once drew recreationally.
I then started brushing up on my German, which I took for 2 years in high school. Realized my lost passion for German, so I dropped Swedish (for the time being) and picked my German back up “full time” Then I met Anna S. She opened my eyes. Teaching ESL to adults, telling me it was so rewarding, so fulfilling. She speaks more than 2 languages, this is what I wanted, I was jealous, said to myself “I wish I could do that, that sounds like exactly what I want. Why have I never thought of doing this.” I wasn’t happy creating art any more . It became a chore, meanwhile learning languages was a fulltime-passtime which became much much more.
I continued to talk to Anna about ESL and teaching and students and seeing the development and progress, It made me want to do it even more. Then I just said “I can, I can teach any language I want (as long as I’m fluent that is) I can be a teacher, nothing is stopping me”. My love for German grew stronger and stronger everyday.
I withdrew from AIB, picked up French and German and it started, I filled out my KU application in one night, sent my college and high school transcripts the next day and sighed with relief.
Two days ago I got accepted to the German Language and Literature Department at KU and I finally realized that this is truly meant to be.
I’m going to teach.
It is so crazy, and I am just now realizing this, that so many friendships I’ve had, I had certain people in middle school who I thought were my best friends we would stay friends forever (except one <3), I had certain people in high school, EVIT included who I thought I would stay best friends with forever. I understand now that so many of the friends that I had, are not really friends, but more like acquaintances, is that what most of our lives friends are? do we really only have a few friends for life who we can seriously count on? But how is, that when I come to college, I meet the most amazing people of my life, like seriously, THE MOST AMAZING people in my fucking life.
I love you guys <3
By the way, I’m listening to Beyoncè’s, Diva.
I want to go here. I want to go here so bad. I am almost 90% certain I am switching my major to Fine Arts, I need this year at AIB as a Fine Arts major to build a portfolio for this school in Berlin. It is one of my life goals to speak another language fluently and to live in another country with the love of my life, Chase.
I want to converse, feel, breathe and live like I am not American. I want to one day have a European passport, I feel like I was born in the wrong country. Yeah the grass is always greener on the other side, but that’s just it. The grass looks so green how can I not go play in it?
Yeah definitely went off point there, this school looks absolutely fabulous. I am happy as an Illustration major but I want to be free, I feel like I chose Illustration because I wanted to be a concept artist previously and not an Illustrator. I know that a lot of Tattooists are Illustrators but there are many who break the chain, some are in the realm of Fine Arts, I want to incorporate my work as a Fine Artist into my career as a Tattooist eventually.